![]() You can move, sort of, via gripping with each corner in varying combinations, and using those corners as anchors when you flop around. Half the time I think they believe I'm making it up, so what am I supposed to do now that I've played I Am Bread, the latest bizarro indie game from Surgeon Simulator 2013 team Bossa Studios? Currently available in Early Access, it's the physics-driven tale of, yes, a slice of bread who desperately wants to become toast. My father-in-law, a retired serviceman who looks like Charlie Chaplin, chuckles bemusedly and half disbelievingly when I tell him I'm writing about human/pigeon romance, magical pony princess P.I.s, and amateur butterfingers open-heart surgery. I see it more as an app for a smart phone or tablet (which it is available for) and I still wouldn’t pay more than $1 for it (Currently available for $4.99 on Apple iOS store).None of my in-laws are gamers, so most of the time anything I'm telling them I reviewing sounds silly to them. I am Bread is currently on the PlayStation Store for $12.99, which is way too much in my opinion. ![]() Like Bossa Studios’ previous title, Surgeon Simulator, the frustration between controls and camera just overpowers the sense of humor it tries to have. Overall I can’t really recommend I am Bread. While these bonus modes can be more fun to play than the story mode, they are mostly enjoyable in short bursts and get boring pretty quickly. ![]() These weren’t nearly as much fun as the bagel and baguette. One you are the sliced bread again but this time in a zero gravity situation where you can fly around the room with tiny little boosters on each of your corners (you can image how these controls handled) and in the other you’re a cracker searching the room for hidden stinky cheese(no joke necessary). There are also two other bonus modes that didn’t really deliver for me. Take the baguette and flop it all over the place destroying plates, glasses, bottles and more. Another bonus mode has you as a baguette and the point of this mode is to cause destruction. Control in this mode is not as frustrating as the sliced bread because you are rolling and can primarily use the analog stick. One has you racing around a room going through check points as a bagel, ROLLing all over the place. In these other modes you control some other baked goods. The bonus modes outside of the story can be pretty fun. There is a slight bit of delightful dough ball goodness in this odd game though. ![]() Why would you eat anything off of your kitchen counters with all these bugs crawling around? I expect the sequel, I am Exterminator, to be announced any day now. I totally get why these things would decrease your edibility bar, but can I ask why your home would have tons of bugs on the counters in the kitchen? I think we have a larger problem than toasting some bread. The edibility bar decreases as the bread is on the floor, touching bugs and a some other hazards. The bread doesn’t have a health bar but rather an edibility bar, once the bar is depleted, you lose. Trekking through the room to get that bread toasted can be quiet complicated. Now that we have an understanding of the frustration that is the controls and camera, it’s time to move on to getting the bread toasted. At this point not only did the controls piss me off, but the camera then too became a thorn in my side. The bread doesn’t just need to move across flat surfaces, but also needs to climb walls and objects. Flipping and flopping with the bread using the shoulder buttons got extremely frustrating for me rather quickly. The control stick can be used to slightly move, but not effectively enough to be used for all movement. Each corner of the slice of bread is paired to a shoulder button and this is how you will do 95% of your movement as the sliced bread. (I named my slice of bread, Groot after the famous Marvel Comics character and his phrase “I am Groot”, being so close to the game’s title.) The bread is controlled using all four of the PS4 controller’s shoulder buttons. So you take Groot…I mean the slice of bread and traverse a given room to find a way to get it toasted. That includes a toaster, an iron, a space heater and some others. In I am Bread’s story mode you are tasked with taking a slice of bread and getting it toasted by any means necessary. I know everyone has been dying for a game that lets you live the life of a slice of bread, but sadly you’re going to have to wait for a better loaf, because I am Bread is just too frustrating to be fun and the novelty wears thin rather quickly. That includes more than just plain old sliced bread, but more on that later. Having said that, I get the joke, this is a game where you control baked goods. ![]() When you hear the title, “I am Bread”, it’s safe to assume you don’t expect a serious game. ![]()
0 Comments
Leave a Reply. |
Details
AuthorWrite something about yourself. No need to be fancy, just an overview. ArchivesCategories |